Every good man has his battles. If you are a knight in shining armor, then you’re a knight who hasn’t been tested, son. Scars—either physical or emotional—are great reminders that once upon a time something tried to kill you, but it didn’t. I often joke that I’m not this gray because I’m old; those grays are the product of going through some shit and coming out of the other side—alive. Like anyone else, I’ve got emotional scars as well as a fair share of physical ones. But I keep moving because I know that whatever it is that I’m dealing with, I know that I can beat it. I know it because my track record proves it. I don’t talk about those battles so much publicly mostly because nobody really cares about the personal shit. You could argue that there are people in your life that do care, and maybe they do, but for the most part nobody is (or should be) more invested in your life than you. That’s especially true when it comes to the big problems in your life (the dragons) and the day-to-day struggles (the demons) that relentlessly attempt to drag you down.
Slaying those dragons and defeating the demons is no easy chore. Just take a look at the obesity rate in America if you don’t believe me. Everyday 42% of Americans struggle with being fat because they consistently lose their daily battle with their demons. Alcoholism is another major demon that 14.4 million Americans admit to struggling with. We all have our demons that we must face, with the intention to defeat, before we let them grow big enough to turn into dragons.
Dragon slaying isn’t an easy chore. Most people avoid confrontation for obvious reasons. What’s more is most people avoid confronting themselves because nobody likes admitting that they’re wrong to the degree that they’re willing to implement change . Recently I conducted a poll on my Instagram (clink link & follow) where I tried to gauge how many self-help books my followers have read in their life. Without being too braggadocios here, the story had a lot of views and the response was dismal. People looked at it and wouldn’t respond. Not like the shit was hard to answer (or that I was offended), but I believe that the majority of those viewers either didn’t want to admit to how many (few) that they have read, or didn’t want to admit to reading any at all. I guess asking for help is still, somehow, considered embarrassing in our society. (Ego is still a big demon most people battle). What’s curious though is that of those who did answer, and said that they read more than 10 self-help books, are all very successful people in the business world. Trust me on my authenticity here when I tell you that the names that answered would be impressive to you. The point to all of that is: those willing to reach out for help to battle their demons, or slay their dragons, see success; and that success comes at the effort of confronting your shit. But you have to be willing to do it.
The Temptation of St. Anthony, by Martin Schongauer (1470)
Again, those kind of battles are not easily won. You’re not going to come out of them with shining armor. I’m confident to assume that we all know people who have had a fairly easy-going life wherein they may have sacrificed to achieve something, but they’ve never had to strap on the armor in order to destroy that which makes them weak. (Side note: those people often have zero personality and their life experiences are full of mundane tales where their only sense of struggle is having to work a 9-5 , or God forbid a third shift, before they could have this suburban dream in the cul-de-sac jungle). Don’t be that guy. That’s not an order to go out and get addicted to shooting dope for the soul purpose of having a triumphant come from behind story of winning; it’s a suggestion to not fall into the pitfalls of The Empire by only being focused on financial success as a measuring stick for worth.
“To live is to suffer. To survive, well, that’s to find meaning in the suffering.”
There comes a time a life where you’re going to need to confront you bullshit. Your demons are going to pull at you daily to keep up with the negative impulses in your life for those brief moments of satisfaction that always lead to affects that hang around longer than those moments/impulses last. Your dragons have been around so long that you avoid them. They come around time and time again (like Smaug) to steal your gold (your happiness, your improvement, your hard work, and efforts) and horde it in their mountain and leave you sad and morally bankrupt. But you’re going to have to man-up. You’re going to have to face this shit or suffer the fate of knowing you never took the chance to be more than your bank account. Guys, we have one shot at life. One opportunity to be here and make an impact where our names will echo throughout history and resonate with being known as a force. If that is not your dream then there’s a cookie-cutter neighborhood with a cute name (like Sassafras Circle or some shit) around the bend for you where you and your neighbors can sit in your driveways talking about high school sports and what could have been ‘if.’ Or you can chose to be better. You can try to be a man, at whatever cost, to play by your rules and not the rules—nay, the chains!—of your demons and dragons. You’ve got to reject that and, as Joe Rogan says, “conquer your inner-bitch.”
Whatever your demons are, whatever dragon they grow to become, YOU have to destroy it. You can’t be afraid, or embarrassed, to ask for help or seek it out on your own. (Google is free). For as much as I dislike the modern world, we have more tools now than ever before at our disposal to resolve any issues we might be dealing with. Therapy, counseling, support groups, gyms, nature trails, isolation tanks, books, friends, online communities, …the list goes on and on while your excuses for maintaining your bullshit dwindles. I talk a lot about “being a man” and harnessing the masculine side of life. That’s because I’ve been there, I’ve done it—I haven’t done all that there is to do, but enough that I’m only qualified to give this kind of advice because I’ve slayed dragons and bested demons. My armor is pretty fucked up, but the shit still works.
This is your open invitation to not only kick start your life in the right direction, but to also reach out to me anytime. I often do AMA on Instagram but if you want a more personal approach, if you want to really get some help on slaying those dragons with some help,please feel free to reach out to me through any avenues of social media work best for you. If you don’t want to ride into that battle alone, believe me, I’m ready to do it with you.
